The Only Sort That Matters
by NoPondInTheForest
Summary: The Doctor was back, on a school night no less, and at it again with the alien mind tricks. At least that was the explanation Craig was going with.


**Written for Julibellule on Tumblr, as part of the TimePetalsPromo. NOT part of my "Consequences" verse, though it probably could be in future! :)**

* * *

"But yeah, his grades have never been better. His mum and I've been thrilled to see him enjoying maths so much this year. I'm not sure what it is that you're doing, but thank you."

Cheeks pinking slightly, the young teacher smiled, quickly turning her attention back to her grade-book. She tapped a pen to full lips, sleek blonde hair drifting over the graceful curve of her cheek. A few beats later, when Craig was met again by warm brown eyes, and another of those wide, blindingly-brilliant smiles, he thought he might have solved the riddle of his twelve-year old son's sudden and fierce devotion to year 8 maths.

"Well, I think that's all for tonight, Mr. Owens," she said, tucking her pen into the crook of the book. "Unless you have any concerns you'd like to discuss? But again, Alfie is a joy to have in my class." The mega-watt smile was turned on the boy, who almost visibly melted. "He's always so helpful, and better yet, he's kind. Certainly can't say that of all of the children," Ms. Tyler added, bright eyes dimming a bit.

Craig ruffled Alfie's short hair. "I did hear something about another fight today, sounds like two of those new Parker boys were involved again? That makes at least half a dozen fights already, and the school year only a month in. Anything being done about it?"

Ms. Tyler hesitated. "Um," she said, brushing back a loose lock of hair. "We've made a few attempts at contacting their family. I'm still hoping they might turn up for parent conferences tonight."

Craig nodded, back of his neck prickling as his gaze was drawn to the right, to a view of the corridor through the tall, narrow window beside the door. Parent-teacher night had reached its tail-end, so the earlier chaos had dwindled down to just a few stragglers, but the lighting out there had gone sort of odd. Sort of...greenish.

In just a few second's span, the weird glow concentrated and narrowed before its source appeared- a emerald-tipped torch, held in the hand of a man. He too passed by and vanished, but it was enough. Craig knew, only too well, that slightly hunched, strong-jawed, swoop-haired silhouette.

He still had nightmares about that silhouette.

"Oh, my god." He was already on his feet, papers crinkling in his hands.

"Are you alright? What's going on?" was out of her chair, turning to the window as well, probably wondering what sort of catastrophe he'd just witnessed in the corridor.

A couple of smaller children skipped on by, followed by their parents. Then all was quiet. Craig met her worried, wondering eyes. She probably thought he was mental. Craig almost wished. In fact, if given a choice- have an odd bout of madness or deal with the Doctor and his newest alien debacle- the sanity would go, every time.

"Mr. Owens?" No judgment tainted her eyes, her tone all kind concern.

"Now this is going to sound mad," said Craig, setting Alfie's papers back down on her desk. "And you have no reason to believe me, just...I just saw this man pass by in the corridor. I know him well, although the only time he ever comes around is when something terrible is happening. Dangerous stuff, like you wouldn't believe."

Ms. Tyler's eyes sharpened, entirely lacking the expected fear or skepticism, and her mouth was tight with something that he couldn't quite place. She gave Craig a long look, fingers playing with one wide strap of her pretty white dress. After mouthing something which might have been his name, she blinked, recognition inexplicably crossing her face. "You're sure about this?"

Craig faltered a little, thrown by her reaction. "Um, yes, I can't even begin to tell you what-"

"No, no," she cut in, waving her hand impatiently. "I mean, you're sure you saw him out there, just now?"

"Positive. And I..." he glanced at Alfie. His son was watching him. His round, freckled face was nervous, but also anticipatory in a way that Craig hadn't seen in ages, not since he was little, back when he believed his old dad to be a hero who could do anything.

That settled it. Craig squared his shoulders. "Yeah. I need to find him, find out what's going on. So please, could you stay here with Alfie? Until I come back and tell you it's safe?"

Ms. Tyler thought, biting her lip. "So you don't think we should evacuate the school?"

"Give me ten minutes," replied Craig, with more confidence than he felt. "Fifteen, tops."

She nodded quickly. "All right. Don't worry about us. I'd never think of wandering off." The teacher slid an arm around Alfie's shoulders and smiled, and the look on his son's face told Craig that maybe this wasn't so bad, after all.

"Oh, and Mr. Owens?" she called, just as he was closing the door. "What you're doing- I think it's great. So brave. Whoever he is, m'sure he needs your help. In fact, if I were you, I'd insist on it. No matter what he says."

He was halfway down the corridor when he heard her voice one more time, echoing from behind him. "You should check the playground!"

* * *

"I'm doing reconnaissance, Craig," said the Doctor, his voice floating out from the shadowy spot beneath a slide. "You don't just sneak up on people who are doing reconnaissance."

The empty schoolyard was mostly dark, three lampposts providing small, moon-shaped circles of light, and the sky seemed enormous, full of twinkling stars. Suddenly Craig felt very exposed standing out in the open like that -like a moderately overweight target in an oxford- and he ducked down, clambering under the playground equipment to join the Time Lord. "Reconnaissance for what? It's been more than ten years and I haven't seen you, and all of a sudden you're here! And at my own son's school!"

Light filtered through the decking overhead and edged the Doctor's profile, and Craig saw him frown thoughtfully in the direction of the brick building. Then his gaze went to Craig, his ancient eyes alight as if he'd just noticed him. "Craig Owens," he said, chuckling, shaking his head in disbelief. His arms came up as if for a hug, though their stooped positions prevented him.

"Focus, Doctor! My son is in that building, right there. My boy. I need to know what's going on."

The Doctor gave him a long look before he moved away a step, and stuck his head out to look up at the sky. "Oh, the usual, but I suspect you already knew that." He licked one finger and held it up, as if testing the wind. "You should take your son and go."

It was good advice, Craig knew. And the last time he didn't follow it, he'd nearly had his brain snatched by evil robots, but yet, there was an anxious note to the Doctor's voice that he couldn't ignore. Whatever was going on had the Time Lord worried. Also, he was alone, and...and he didn't do well when alone. Craig wasn't sure how he knew that was true, but it was true nonetheless.

He dug the toe of one shoe into the wood-chips. "Told you before. When there's aliens around, it's safer to be with you."

With a soft snort, the Doctor beckoned him out into the open. "Well, nice as it's been, this little catch-up, it seems as if nothing is going to happen tonight, after all. So-"

A swift breeze rushed in, blowing a mess of stray leaves across the asphalt, and suddenly it was so bright that Craig could pick out every fine line in the Doctor's face. They looked at each other, wide-eyed, and then both their faces tilted skyward.

An enormous dark something loomed overhead, a solid, curved shape, which grew steadily larger as it descended. "What the hell is that?" gasped Craig, jaw hanging open. "Is that a..." Could it be? It was. Even in the dark he could make out the portholes, see its white sails flapping in the wind. "It's a pirate ship."

The Doctor turned an exasperated look on him, the wind blowing his thick hair around madly. "Really, Craig? A pirate ship? You've seen pirate ships fly, have you?"

Craig opened his mouth to answer and the Doctor shook his head. "I meant in reality, films don't count." Reaching inside his coat, he pulled out his screwdriver and aimed it at the ship. Nothing happened and he huffed, then whacked it against his leg a few times. "Pirate ship, indeed," he went on under his breath, though plenty loud enough for Craig to hear. "Does he think we're in the 32nd century?"

"Well, what _is_ it then?"

"It came from outer-space, so wouldn't you say it's a spaceship? A Drivakian cruiser, to be accurate. Or, I guess you could also call it their _mother_ ship." The Doctor snorted, amused, like he had some inside joke with himself.

"But why? What do they want from us?"

"Technically, they don't want anything from _us_ , us being you, or me, or Alfie. We're not at all what they're looking for."

The Time Lord held up his screwdriver, inspecting its length, and Craig's fingers twitched as he half-considered attempting to strangle a straight answer out of him. "Doctor..." he said, a warning in his voice.

"Read any of your newspapers lately? Three local women gone missing?"

"Yeah, what of it? Are you telling me that pirates from space have kidnapped them?"

Pointing the sonic at the ship again, the Doctor flashed a grin when it worked. "They're not pirates. They're kids playing pirates. Well, technically they're alien kids playing pirates. And what do alien pirate children need most?" All at once a light, like a powerful spotlight, beamed straight down from the ship, forming a yellow circle on the asphalt near a basketball hoop, several meters away.

The Doctor pocketed his sonic, looking supremely satisfied. "Mothers, Craig. That's what they need. But they've got the wrong planet, again. They can't steal women from here."

Craig was staring at the weird spotlight. "What is that?"

A funny little smirk played at his mouth. "I got them to put out the gangway. Well, a teleportation beam, anyway."

"Wait a minute, you're going _onboard?_ "

The Doctor, who was already heading toward the yellow beam, tossed a glare back over his shoulder. "Shush! You'll scare them off!"

"Scare them- but isn't that what we want? Isn't that what you _do?_ Scare the nasty aliens away from Earth?"

Yanking on his coat lapels, the Doctor came back toward Craig. "Do you know how long I've waited for this?" he hissed. "Days, weeks! Parked in the same spot, bored out of my mind, spending most of everyday alone, while she swans off to play teacher. Weeks, Craig!" He turned his glare on the ship overhead, fists clenching. "While they drag their feet, knowing all the while that she'd make them a perfect mother. And they're aliens! Did I ever tell you that nearly every bloody alien we come across wants to keep her?"

"Erm..."

"So they finally show up and you think I want to miss my chance? All because you won't stop talking?"

"Ah..." said Craig, jaw dropping as he noticed something just behind the aggravated Time Lord. He pointed, carefully. The Doctor frowned at him, and then slowly swiveled round.

In the glittering, condensed beam of sun-coloured light, stood a small, feminine figure, long aureate hair falling over her shoulders. With her face upturned and arms slightly outstretched, her softly clinging dress a shimmering gold, she looked every inch a goddess.

"Rose," breathed the Doctor, alarmed, taking a step her way.

The 'goddess', (or as Craig now realized, Alfie's maths teacher) turned a narrowed gaze on the Time Lord, who skidded to a stop.

Panic rose up in Craig. Those aliens were going to whisk her away any second; what was the Doctor doing? Wasn't he going to rescue her, stop this? Rose hung her head back again, as if waiting, and Craig was nearly ready to rush over there himself when suddenly one of the school's doors clanged open and his son, his Alfie, burst from the building, dashing toward his teacher as fast as his short, rather chubby legs could carry him.

"Don't!" the Doctor shouted. Too late. The boy tackled Ms. Tyler out of the beam, both of them landing hard on the asphalt. And then everything went dark again.

Cursing, the Doctor ran to them, Craig hot on his heels. "What'd you do that for?" he said, scowling blackly at Alfie as he helped the young teacher get to her feet.

Craig gaped at him, kneeling on the ground beside his son. "He just saved her! He's a hero!"

The Time Lord shook his head, scoffing, as he helped Ms. Tyler brush dirt from her dress.

And something clicked in Craig's head. This lovely, sweet teacher- she had _wanted_ to board that space-pirate-ship. Not only was it supremely dangerous but entirely mad, and the only explanation Craig could pull from thin air was that the Doctor had done it again.

Everyone loved him. Willingly did as he asked. And Craig had always found this not only off-putting, but highly inexplicable.

But now this; wasn't this proof if anything ever was? He must have some weird hypnotic power, and he used it on people. Like an alien spell.

Poor, innocent Rose. She was utterly clueless, thought Craig, watching her lay her hand, palm up, trustingly in the Doctor's larger one, allowing him to inspect some small injury. Craig's blood begin to boil. How dare he? Now he had the audacity to pretend concern, when all along, he'd only wanted to use her as bait?

"Ms. Tyler," said Craig, coming to a decision. Stiffly, he got to his feet and tugged his son up as well. "You need to know that-"

She blinked her long lashes at Alfie. "That was so sweet," she told him, beaming.

The Doctor made a face, and quit treating her palm with his sonic. "Sweet? Why are you calling that sweet?"

"He saved me." She sniffed. "More than you thought of doing."

Gaping, the Doctor dropped her hand. "You argued with me for _days_ about being the one to board that ship!"

She shrugged. "Would have been nice for you to at least look a bit worried."

"But-"

Lips pursed, she shot him a sharp look, as if she'd just thought of something. "So you remember that little promise, do you? Then why were you sneaking around out here tonight without even telling me?"

The Doctor looked down and kicked at a piece of gravel. "It's not like I knew for sure they were coming. It was just a hunch. You were busy. You know, parent-teacher night and all."

Her hands flew to her hips. "This is the entire reason I'm here!"

Craig was stunned. What in blazes had the Doctor done to her? This was worse than he thought. "Ms. Tyler," he interrupted, "I don't know what he's been telling you, but that's an alien spaceship, and they've been abducting-"

He trailed off, as she was apparently far too involved her glaring contest with the Doctor to pay Craig any mind.

"Give it over," she demanded suddenly, holding her hand out.

The Doctor's eyes went wide. "Rose-"

"Give it!"

With a heavy, petulant sigh, he poked a hand into his coat, retrieved his screwdriver, and slapped it into her palm.

"Thank you," she said, all smiles and sweetness again. Craig stared, dumbfounded, watching her rapidly flick through the settings with her thumbnail. She aimed it skyward and the tool whirred.

"This is Ms. Tyler!" she proclaimed, loud and without warning, making the other three start. "In case you can't tell, I've just activated your PA system." A shuffling sound filled the air, and she cocked her head. "Clark and Teddy Parker, I can hear you two up there. Now you and your brothers disembark this instant."

Several seconds passed, and then one, two, four beams of light appeared, all identical to the one from earlier. One by one, the summoned students flickered into existence- four little boys, dressed in normal Earth clothes, their ages ranging from around seven to twelve. Ms. Tyler strode their way, heels clacking. "It's okay," she told their contrite faces. "I know you didn't mean any harm. But thing is, I can't run off and be mother to all you boys. I'm sorry."

The Doctor, who had been flitting around, wringing his hands, thought this was going too far. "Are you seriously apologizing-"

The look she sent him was quick, but it promised death. His jaw clicked shut.

The littlest one, towheaded with blue eyes and rosy cheeks, came forward to tug on Rose's hand. "But Ms. Tyler," he said, (only he pronounced it " _Tywer_ ", which made him, if possible, even more adorable) "You're our favorite mother ever."

She blinked, lips tugging into a soft smile. "Really?"

"Rose!" The Doctor's hands were deep in his hair. "You can't listen to that! You can't...just run off to be their mother!"

"Why not?" she asked, flippantly. "Might be fun."

The Doctor didn't respond. He just sort of...deflated, and for a long moment, he looked every bit as old as Craig knew him to be. Then there was a flurry of movement, ending with Ms. Tyler throwing her arms around his neck. "Doctor," she murmured, one hand stroking up into his hair. "We've been over and over this. You're never losing me again, ever. It was just a joke. Well, mostly."

The Doctor squeezed her tight, then pulled back, eyes sparkling. "Mostly, eh? So you actually fancy the idea of swanning off to Neverland, being a mum to all those lads? Why?"

"I dunno," replied Rose, her own eyes dancing. "Might not mind the practice."

He instantly paled, like he might pass out. Rose laughed. "Relax, m'not trying to make an announcement or anything. But you never know, yeah? It's us. Crazier things have happened."

Relief and disappointment warred in the Doctor's expression. "I don't know, Rose Tyler. For me? That'd probably top out as the craziest."

Their smiles were identical and knowing, their eyes locked, faces drawing together like magnets, and...

...and heaven help him, now they were _kissing,_ quite fervently,and Craig was so shocked that a good seven seconds must have ticked by before he even thought of clapping a hand over Alfie's eyes.

"Show's over," said the Doctor, his lips red, darting a glance all around as he backed off slightly from the teacher. "Oi. I expected better of you, Craig. When you were snogging Sophie, did I stand around, looking all worried as if the world might be ending?"

"Well, how should I know? Isn't it? Because I'm pretty sure you don't _do_ that. What, you have a thing for schoolteachers?"

"Rose isn't a schoolteacher," the Doctor shot back, as he slipped an arm around her waist. "She's my wife."

"Sorry, what?"

"My wife." The Time Lord rose up on his heels, eyes gleaming with pride. "It's new. I'm trying it out."

Rose swatted at the Doctor and he grinned, happily. Craig just stood there, helplessly wondering if perhaps _he_ was the one whose brain had been addled by an alien spell.

"You lot, back on your ship," the Doctor was saying, hands clasped, all business now. "I'm giving you one minute- that's sixty seconds, mind- to have all those women teleported right back to where you got them from. For the last time, this is the wrong planet; you want the _seventh_ star to the right." He turned, muttering to himself. "I swear, I've dealt with this ten times if I have once, ever since old Barrie buggered up the directions in that bloody book."

Giggling, Rose grabbed hold of his jacket and shamelessly planted her lips on his again. The pirate-kids made gagging sounds before disappearing. Alfie just looked heartbroken.

"Mmm," said the Doctor, smiling down into her face. "I think our feet made it off the ground that time."

"Was that supposed to be a pixie dust joke? So cheesy!"

"How can I help it?" His eyes glinted. "You're definitely my happy thought."

Rose smiled and Craig groaned loudly, especially since they looked ready to start kissing again.

The spaceship was quiet as it faded away into the darkness, but Craig couldn't tear his eyes from the Doctor and Rose. They stood molded together, his arm round her waist and her head on his shoulder, and every line of the Time Lord was relaxed and contented. Like for once, his feet weren't itchy. Like the nomadic alien was settled, and...home.

It made him seem almost human.

Almost.

"Giant pirate ship flying off above us, and you stare at me, Craig," remarked the Doctor, on turning around. "Should Sophie be worried?"

"Sorry."

The Doctor sighed. "Is this just so weird for you? Try spending centuries apart from the woman you love, and then see how well you behave."

There was irritation in his eyes, but more surprisingly, hurt. Craig swallowed, scuffing his shoe on the ground, cheeks heating as it finally hit him. How stupid he'd been, all those years ago, being jealous of the Doctor. Assuming that the only reason he so easily garnered people's love was through tricks, charms and manipulation.

But truth was, the Doctor hadn't cared. Hadn't tried. Hadn't ever really wanted it, all that empty admiration. In fact, he'd likely coveted what Craig himself had possessed all along. Soul-deep, loyal, _forever_ sort of love, the sort that needs only two to complete its circuit. The only sort that matters.

"Actually," said Craig, clearing his throat and placing a hand on Alfie's shoulder, "I was wondering if you two would like to come round to the house. Sophie'd love to see you again, Doctor. And you could introduce us to your wife. Properly, I mean."

"Oh. Well," the Doctor fidgeted, bouncing on his toes. "That's lovely, but we should be off."

"C'mon, Doctor, what's another hour or two?" Rose wheedled. "You know I'd love to meet Sophie."

"We have biscuits," promised Craig. "I know how you like those."

The Doctor considered him, looking guarded. "You just want to...interrogate me about Rose."

"Rude," chided Rose.

"Not interrogate," countered Craig. "I thought we were friends. Isn't this what friends do? Pop back in once in a while, just to say hello?"

The Doctor smiled, reluctantly, and Rose elbowed him. "I'll let you be the one to tell the story. You like that, too."

"Oh, all right." He bopped the tip of her nose with his finger. "But only cause it's got a happy ending."


End file.
